Begin Improving Your Life and Relationship
- Discover how to effectively communicate with your partner and get your relationship back on track.
- Find out the “Do’s and Don’t” of successful relationships.
- Imagine your relationship being tension-free, having fun and laughing together again.
Other couples have rescued their relationship and so can you!
What to Expect from Couples or Marriage Therapy
My objective is to help you get back on track and learn how to stay on track without needing to come to couples counselling ever again.
At Victoria Counselling Solutions the couples therapy is goal-driven, solution-oriented and strength-based, getting results!
Through marriage therapy you can expect to:
- Begin working together in building lines of communication immediately.
- Develop goals and objectives for couples counselling, which may include working on communication, breaking dysfunctional patterns, learning how to deal with challenging issues and emotions, understanding how to problem-solve, etc.
- Determine your relationship strengths and areas that need improvement.
- Learn about the affects and effects of the problem(s) on the relationship.
- Use Questionnaires as assessment vehicles.
- Discover the features that erode and deteriorate relationships, how to identify them and change them.
- Find out the aspects of a healthy, satisfying relationship.
- Develop strategies to manage the problem(s), re-establish the marital friendship and increase marital satisfaction.
- Discover how to use an assortment of “tools” to begin changing the problem interactional patterns.
- Use the tools provided deliberately, both in the counselling meetings and at home.
The Problems Couples Therapy can Address
Couples usually come for marriage counselling when there is an impasse in their relationship. Sometimes the situation feels scary or hopeless. The goal for couples counselling is to help you restore lines of communication and rebuild a loving relationship. Beginning to learn how to discuss issues in a safe, caring environment where you will feel heard and validated is the first step.
Communication
When a relationship is in distress, communicating effectively becomes a greater challenge. In marriage therapy you can learn how to identify and deal with communication barriers, in addition to learning how to effectively discuss and manage problems can change stressful issues into productive and constructive conversations.
Arguments and Anger
A relationship saturated by arguments and anger can be transformed into a relationship that is founded on trust, mutual respect and friendship. Marriage therapy can help you learn how to manage conflict, "hot topics" and the "hot emotions" can help bring couples together, rather than being pulled apart.
Emotional Distance
Relationships that learn how to pull together in challenging times can renew the emotional connection, and can lead to a renewed sense of pleasure and enjoyment of one another again.
Sexual Issues
Romance can be rekindled and reignited. It is possible to learn how to discuss issues regarding sex and physical intimacy without feeling embarrassed or rejected.
Infidelity
Affairs can be toxic, but they do not have to mean the end of the relationship. Couples counseling can show you how to manage the emotional turmoil of an affair can help couples reclaim and restore their own relationship again. This may even create a stronger more secure and resilient relationship, protected from future vulnerabilities.
Separation and Divorce
Sometimes couples or the individuals themselves have begun to explore if separation and divorce are the only option. Counselling can help defuse the emotions involved so that rational decision making is possible. For couples who face a definite need to end their relationship, marriage counselling has a powerful role to play. It can help couples work on preventing destructive communication and behaviour, which is especially important for families with children.
If you want to find out more about my couples or marriage counselling services work, contact me for a free consultation.
My Approach
- My approach is goal-oriented, strength-based and solution-focused.
- I am client-directed and outcome oriented, meaning I want you to get what you want and achieve lasting results as quickly as possible.
- In building on your strengths and identifying “soft spots”, you will discover how to use effective, practical tools to improve your life and your relationship.
- You will learn effective and practical problem-solving skills to manage issues.
This is all done in the safety of a comfortable, non-judgemental environment. You will be working together, in a collaborative manner, in efforts to actively build solutions and achieve your hopes and goals.
I practice from a number of theoretical orientations. Specific to relationships, I use two research and evidence based therapies, namely the Gottman Marital Therapy Method and Emotionally Focused Therapy.
I also practice from several other approaches when appropriate. Among those are Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Client-Directed Outcome Informed Therapy, Solution-Focused Therapy and Narrative Therapy. Also, at times, I utilize Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy (EMDR), Thought-Field Therapy (TFT) and Hypnotherapy.
Fees
Fees for counselling and psychotherapeutic services follow the Recommended Fees Schedule of the British Columbia Association of Clinical Counsellors. A sliding fee schedule can be negotiated in individual circumstances.
Many employee Health Plans will assist with the cost of counselling.
Call 250-888-0979 for more details about insurance coverage.
Our conversations went round and round, getting nowhere. We were frustrated and started to drift apart. Getting a handle on how to discuss issues really helped ease the tension and we started to feel like a team again.
RD&JW, Victoria, BC
